{"id":781,"date":"2015-12-07T00:42:04","date_gmt":"2015-12-07T06:42:04","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.poemsforpatti.com\/love\/?p=781"},"modified":"2015-12-07T00:42:04","modified_gmt":"2015-12-07T06:42:04","slug":"10-minutes-walking-texas-highway-60-october-10-1969","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.poemsforpatti.com\/love\/2015\/12\/07\/10-minutes-walking-texas-highway-60-october-10-1969\/","title":{"rendered":"10 Minutes Walking Texas Highway 60, October 10, 1969"},"content":{"rendered":"

It’s a stranger moon than I have ever seen in the Texas sky,<\/span><\/p>\n

I’m more afraid of what I don’t see than no cars coming by,<\/span><\/p>\n

It’s following me as I walk this highway I’ve driven so often,<\/span><\/p>\n

Been to hell and back but thought I’d be riding in a coffin,<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I wish I wasn’t going home but I have no other place to go,<\/span><\/p>\n

Over two years ago it took extreme courage just to show,<\/span><\/p>\n

This damn sea bag is suppose to weigh eight nine pounds,<\/span><\/p>\n

I’m so lean now compared to when I carried so many rounds,<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The draft and war was terrible but my time is finally through,<\/span><\/p>\n

My heart is so heavy as I struggle to get my mind off of you,<\/span><\/p>\n

I’ve journeyed through my mind and my emotions trying to find,<\/span><\/p>\n

Why I haven’t heard from you is finally taking a toll on my mind,<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I have no idea why I’m sobbing so deeply as if I’m a beaten child,<\/span><\/p>\n

To say I’m as low as a man can get would be words far too mild,<\/span><\/p>\n

The Navy medic prescribed these pills to ease my mind he said,<\/span><\/p>\n

I’ve wondered many times if they should make me feel so dead,<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I’m night walking so alone, I feel I have no ties to family or friend,<\/span><\/p>\n

Perhaps a cry alone in the darkness will help my heart to mend,<\/span><\/p>\n

I’ve studied these stars alone at night as I prayed you would wait,<\/span><\/p>\n

It seems as if the brutality that brought me home came too late,<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I suffered the greatest cruelties man can place upon another,<\/span><\/p>\n

If I endured it to return home to emptiness I would prefer other,<\/span><\/p>\n

Although you’re still so young I know your heart once felt love,<\/span><\/p>\n

If once for me it must have departed to be no longer thinking of,<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

It seems as if I was born with you in a place no living soul knows,<\/span><\/p>\n

A place where eternal love is born and a river of love forever flows,<\/span><\/p>\n

So rare is this anomalous wonder that for a day a choir of angel sings,<\/span><\/p>\n

Songs open to trumpets blare and soften to harmonizing violin strings,<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

As I walk and I cry I remember remembering the future of your hand,<\/span><\/p>\n

So crazy is my heart that to forever hold your hand I crazily planned,<\/span><\/p>\n

I had, I truly had planned to hold your hand and walk as we grew old,<\/span><\/p>\n

I had planned, I truly had to pull you close to protect you from the cold,<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

All the way to Asia and back I watched a star I called our star for so long,<\/span><\/p>\n

And tonight, the night of my “victorious” journey home I feel I don’t belong,<\/span><\/p>\n

I’ve walked alone for so long now that I believe my mantra may be “alone”,<\/span><\/p>\n

I’m no longer a shining star and our star has fallen or has it never shone?<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Despair is in the night air and my sobs have slowed to but a childlike cry,<\/span><\/p>\n

I understand my beautiful angel and perhaps someday you’ll tell me why,<\/span><\/p>\n

Didn’t it feel right to you when I pulled you tight against my beating chest,<\/span><\/p>\n

I am alive today because of loving you and because of you I did my best,<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Yet as I walk thinking of family rejection, your rejection, and country too,<\/span><\/p>\n

I wished I could return to you, we must be careful what we wish for its true,<\/span><\/p>\n

The brutality I endured in the red hands was my ticket to freedom I thought,<\/span><\/p>\n

And here I walk so alone that I feel I could disappear and easily be forgot,<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I have moments of elation as I think “yet I am alone, it is I that had the kiss”,<\/span><\/p>\n

My heart quickens to beat hard and fast as it did last year in heaven’s bliss,<\/span><\/p>\n

All I want to be is whatever I have to be to be loved by you until time’s end,<\/span><\/p>\n

A desperate dream? And today I am but a lonely warrior that will never mend,<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I am hanging by a thread little girl, I have never been so afraid in my life,<\/span><\/p>\n

How can I be so afraid after I endured so much brutality and war’s strife?<\/span><\/p>\n

Although I walk my vessel is adrift as I search the heavens for a sign of you,<\/span><\/p>\n

I feel a flickering glow deep inside as if you just thought of me, I hope it’s true.<\/span><\/p>\n

The end, by Pat.\u00a0 Written October 10, 1969 at 23:45<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It’s a stranger moon than I have ever seen in the Texas sky, I’m more afraid of what I don’t see than no cars coming by, It’s following me as I walk this highway I’ve driven so often, Been to hell and back but thought I’d be riding in a coffin,   I wish I […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-781","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","category-uncategorized","czr-hentry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.poemsforpatti.com\/love\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/781","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.poemsforpatti.com\/love\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.poemsforpatti.com\/love\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.poemsforpatti.com\/love\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.poemsforpatti.com\/love\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=781"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.poemsforpatti.com\/love\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/781\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":782,"href":"https:\/\/www.poemsforpatti.com\/love\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/781\/revisions\/782"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.poemsforpatti.com\/love\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=781"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.poemsforpatti.com\/love\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=781"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.poemsforpatti.com\/love\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=781"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}